Hey Tom:
It was delightful to spend a little time
with you on Friday night. The other apprentices as well as the
customers were also excited by your presence.
Now to rate your performance as an
"apprentice Body Arts Technician" separating Tom Becka the Radio
Host from your duties here; I thought you did very well.
The most important thing in any body arts
studio is Sterility. I had a sense that you understand that
prime directive and were willing to work well with that
concept. I would give you a "A" on Sterility. On working with
the general public and making them feel welcome I would give you
an "A++". Never before has a shop bitch (a term of endearment I
assure you) showed as much enthusiasm for the new job at hand.
Congratulations at a job well done. Of course, no person is
perfect so now we get to the weaker side of your performance.
Your skills at the art table were, well lets just say,
so-so. The art test inside match book covers is not looking
for you. You hold promise, as you have only one way to go -
Improvement. I would rate your art skills as "C+".
The art ability is not your failing
score. Your only failing scores were in Cleaning and Goffering.
Not once all evening did I see you with a mop or squirt bottle
in your hand. Sure our bathroom was clean, but do you know
what a photo of Tom Becka in the bathroom on his hands and
knees would be worth on EBAY? You kind of dropped that ball on
that category. An as a gofer, you neglected to wait hand and
foot on the other more experienced apprentices. Tom, if you
expect to make it in this business, remember the pecking order
and serve your masters well.
As our newest member of the apprentice
staff, it will be your duty for eternity to always think of skin
as more than a place to hang your shirt and pants. Skin is
now for you a sacred institution where man is able to express
sentiments to the very Gods that placed us here.
As you go forward Tom into your new found
talents and responsibilities, never forget the little people
that gave you your start that cold winter night in a modest
little studio in Lincoln NE.
The staff of Guns 2 Roses wishes you peace
and tranquility as you enter your new life as a Tattoo/Piercing
Artist.
Sincerely and with best wishes,
Gary & the gang
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